Skylar is a Texas-based wedding planner & designer sharing her sanity-saving processes & templates.


Ceremony Tips for Wedding Party Members: Your Expert Guide for a Smooth and Memorable Event

As a trusted planning partner for couples, I’m here to ensure that every member of the wedding party feels confident and supported during the ceremony. Whether you’re a bridesmaid, groomsman, or part of the honor guard, these tips will help you navigate the ceremony with ease and grace. Let’s dive in…

Trust in the Coordinator

A bride and her father prepare to walk down the aisle at The Peach Orchard in Spring Texas. The Chancey Charm team of coordinators mans the doors.

A good coordinator will be there for you every step of the way, especially during the processional. While it’s helpful to know your order and be familiar with the ceremony flow, don’t stress about the exact timing of your walk. The coordinator should cue you when it’s time to head to your designated spot, allowing you to focus on the joyous moment unfolding.

Stand Tall and Stay Loose

When you reach the altar, remember to stand on the balls of your feet. This posture will naturally keep your knees relaxed and prevent any unexpected dizziness or fainting spells. Keeping your cool is essential, and this small adjustment can make a world of difference.

Holding Flowers with Grace

Bridesmaids wearing shades of blush, look on smiling as their friend exchanges vows with her groom.
Credit: Divya Pande

For those entrusted with holding flowers, here’s a helpful tip: position them at belly button height. Tilt the tops of the flowers slightly outward (bottoms of the stems toward your abdomen), ensuring that guests can admire their beauty rather than focusing on the stems. Note that bouquets often have pearl-topped pins holding the ribbon wrap, indicating the back of the bouquet. If you see pearls, face them towards your body, unless instructed otherwise by the florist or coordinator.

Graceful Posture for Non-Flower Holders

If you aren’t holding flowers, like groomsmen or ushers, there’s still an opportunity to look the part. Cross your left hand over your right (or vice versa), creating a unified and intentional look within the group. This simple posture adds a touch of refinement to your presence.

Find Your Focal Point

If you’re unsure where to direct your gaze during the ceremony, look to the couple. They are your beacon of guidance. Ensure that your shoulders are always facing them. While waiting for the couple to make their entrance, face the doors. As soon as the last member of the couple has walked down the aisle, gracefully turn your body to follow their lead.

Mastering the Recessional

A couple shares their first kiss at their botanical boho wedding ceremony at Gardener Ranch in Carmel Valley, California.
Credit: Kayla Esparza

The recessional is the one moment when you’ll need to remember your cue independently. Speak with the coordinator to clarify your “sign” for when it’s your turn to proceed. A common approach is to allow the couple to exit the ceremony space completely before the wedding party follows. As the pair in front reaches the second row of chairs, the next couple proceeds, and so on until everyone has exited the space. This synchronized progression ensures everyone exits in a well-paced manner.

BONUS: The Kid Conundrum

If there are adorable little ones involved in the ceremony, it’s essential to remain calm and flexible. Kids will be kids, and unpredictable moments can arise. If a child becomes hesitant or refuses to walk down the aisle, it’s okay. Instead of forcing them, allow a trusted guardian to accompany them in the hallway and allow the processional to continue without them. Remember, the focus is on celebrating love, and a child’s comfort should always come first.

By embracing these ceremony tips, you’ll be well-prepared to fulfill your role as a valuable member of the wedding party. Trust in the coordinator, stand tall with loose knees, maintain a graceful posture (whether or not you’re holding flowers), find your focal point, and nail the recessional. And if kids are part of the equation, remain calm and adaptable. Remember, the focus is on celebrating love, and your support is essential in creating a smooth and memorable ceremony for the couple and everyone involved.

With these expert tips, you can approach the wedding day with confidence, knowing that you have the knowledge to navigate each moment with ease. Enjoy being an integral part of this special day and cherish the memories created as you stand by the couple’s side. Congratulations to the happy couple, and may their journey be filled with love and joy!

Psst… want to learn what to expect from the wedding rehearsal? Check out my post about that right here.

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Photography by Smith House Weddings